Rosser Hot Fifteen

YOU'RE WONDERING NOW:
"Work" (13)

15) John Legend, "Ordinary People" (10)
14) Beck, "E-Pro" (14)*
13) Louis XIV, "Finding Out True Love Is Blind" (9)
12) Common feat. Kanye West & the Last Poets, "The Corner" (11)
11) 50 Cent, "Just A Lil' Bit" (12)*

10) Ying Yang Twins, "Wait" (15)*
09) Audioslave, "Be Yourself" (debut)
08) Weezer, "Beverly Hills" (7)
07) Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl" (8)*
06) T.I., "You Don't Know Me" (4)

05) The Game & 50 Cent, "Hate It Or Love It" (6)
04) Ludacris, "Number One Spot" (2)

03) 50 Cent, "Disco Inferno" (3)

02) Snoop Dogg feat. Justin Timberlake, "Signs" (5)*

01) Amerie, "1 Thing" (1) [1m]

Ambient music: the Cars - You Might Think

See Friday Love. See Friday Hate. Live, Friday, Live.

LOVE: To quote the Hall of Fame O'Jays, "It's Friday! Thank God it's Friday, and I just got paid..."

HATE: Going back to work. Not going for a week you just mentally fall in a pattern where you don't want to go anymore because you haven't for so long and the little acoutrements of vegetating and letting yourself go to seed are far, far too much fun.

LOVE: Going back to work, because money is a major issue if I'm to go to Miami and do it right. Heh heh heh. I'm witty.

LOVE: Busting Aaron yet again. And he had trip Kings, which is what really makes it sad. Sadly for him, the trip Kings were shared on the board, and I had pocket sixes. Olsen Twins, bitch!

LOVE: Fumari. I love the hookah. I love the hot chocolate. I love Liz. And I'm starting to fall in love with Mandy. It's a nice little cozy nook.

LOVE: Running into hot girls and actually remembering where from. That was starting to grate on me last night. Jen from Spanish class. Still hot, too. We might party together, or be nerds at Borders. She seemed really interested in the novel too. If only she wasn't probably taken, but you know how that works.

LOVE: Taking Natalie hopefully to see Brenda & Glenda tonight. I feel like Red crossing the border into Mexico.

HATE: In my gloating of last night, I left Natalie in the backseat of Aaron's ride. I think he's bringing her over pretty soon, so it ain't nuthin', really.

LOVE: Saturday night I'm fittin' to tear the club up for the first time in what seems like ages but has probably been closer to three weeks.

LOVE: The big-ass Cinco de Mayo party in the Gaslamp. And I get off at 5:30, and it's across the street. I practically HAVE to go, right? It's one thing if it was some faraway trip but it's across the street, and I go all the time anyway. I practically owe it to the Gaslamp to go and get my hustle on.

LOVE: The idea of wearing my Dr. Wagner mask to work on the Cinco and just play it off as if nothing's out of the ordinary.

LOVE: I can get an adapter for <$20 and hook up this DVD player to my old school TV, finally almost making the outside world obsolete.

LOVE: I've suddenly realized I need a minifridge, if I really want to hole up like a pro.

LOVE/HATE: Everytime the Winamp plays "Lose My Breath" I end up inevitably dancing in my seat, which is quite goofy. But I own my goofy, so it's all right.

HATE: I'm still snerking and coughing out little chunks of phlegm every so often. I'm not sick anymore, but it's still happening just enough to be an annoying pain in the ass.

LOVE: I've invented a slang term. breath mint, a noun or adj, used to describe someone or something that is cool or fresh. And it should be up on urbandictionary.com any moment now. My legacy continues to spread.

Ambient music: favorite 01 song, Incubus - Wish You Were Here

Stretching It Out To The Breaking Point

Astute and frequent visitors of the Site of Sites will note my babe list has stretched out to 40 (that's right, a 60% increase of tuna for you) and you can see it whenever you want on the side of the page just after the links, right before the recent posts, next to the mayonaisse, behind the milk, to the left of the leftover pizza but in front of the baking soda.

There's no big changes in the top 10, though, as Jessica is pretty much going to be #1 all year. But it's still fun.

We return you to your caricature of a life, already in progress...

Wait, just to cover my bases:

debut, comeback, debut, 22, debut, debut, debut, 24, debut, comeback
debut, comeback, debut, comeback, 21, 15, 23, debut, 25, 18
17, debut, 13, 14, 11, 16, comeback, 20, 19, 12
7, 10, 8, 6,9, 3, 5, 4, 2, 1

Ambient music: David Bowie - Heroes

The Death of a Dresser

Back up in yo ass with the ressurection

Is the group harder than an erection that shows no affection

They wanna ban us on Capital Hill

'Cause its die muthafuckas, die muthafuckas, KILL!

All along it was the ghetto, nuthin' but the ghetto,

Takin' short steps, one foot at a time and kept my head low

I'll never let go, cause if I let go,

Then I'd be spineless I'M GOIN' INSAAAAAAANE

I think my mind just,

Goes out of control and judge on subjects muthafuckas read about

I touch on the shit they believe without

I've seen this muthafucka's non-spoken

I've seen the same nigga with a nine, die with his eyes open

And simply what this means is

He didn't know every dog had his day, until he seen his

I bet you muthafuckas will too,

'Cause its die muthafuckas, die muthafuckas, kill foo

Aw, fuck, chumps on a killin' spree again, with guillotines for men/I walk around town with a frown on my face/fuck the whole world, fittin' to catch a murder case...

Ambient music: --Geto Boyz, "Die Mother Fucker"

My Tax Refund and Entertainment Dollars At Work

It was all going so well. There but for the grace of a hand. I came out seven bucks behind in the home game tonight/earlier today but I should've been ahead about 5 or so. I put in a 10 spot on Qs & Ks, which is pretty smart for two pair.

Stupid Bruce flopped the nuts, an Ace-high straight.

There but for that one hand.

On the other hand, I busted Aaron twice. So that's fun. Not for him obviously, but he feeds me, I feed Bruce (apparently), and the food chain continues unabated. How dare Aaron have the gall to call my K-5 offsuit with Siegfried & Roy (pocket queens). You'd think after the last two times, he'd learn something.

It's nice, this not being sick and having money.

Ambient music: Human League - Don't You Want Me

HATE! LOVE! FRIDAY!

HATE: THIS FUCKING COLD. I don't know what's going on when three straight nights of NyQuil fail to knock a cold the hell out the box but it's happened now. I think the cold my stupid brother had last week mixed with one of the people's colds that were going around work this past week and they banded together to make some particularly annoying strain of hypercold that is just a big-time pain in the fucking ass.

HATE: I'm stuck in the house. I finally get a week off, and now I'm stuck in the house trying to beat this thing down for at least the forseeable future.

HATE: Having no money. I've come to the realization I need money. Money can be used in exchange for goods and services, as Homer J. put it so eloquently.

HATE: If I had money, I couldn't leave the house anyway because of the fucking cold. If I didn't have the fucking cold, I still wouldn't have any fucking money. So here I sit.

HATE: Missing out on Poker Night.

HATE: Reeling off a fat string of Hates for the topic, but being broke and sick is about as craptacular as it gets. Let's see if I can't right the ship a bit.

LOVE: Actually being off this weekend and sick (though hopefully the latter will go away) will enable me to stay holed up in my room and watch the NBA playoffs.

LOVE: The NBA playoffs. I'm really interested to see San Antonio/Denver as the Nuggets have been Lloyd Banks since getting Karl on board and Duncan's injury might be more serious than the Antonians are letting on. Plus, the idea of someone losing who got next to Eva Longoria is always good. Even the East is up-and-down intriguing this year between the Pistons trying to repeat, the Heat trying to Shaq-Fu them over, the sudden resurgence of the Bulls and Wizards and even the Pacers trying to sneak in there. Good times.

LOVE: Charles Barkley on commentary, because the man simply refuses to give a rat's ass whether the camera is on or not. You always know at some point during a show he's going to say something that's going to make Ernie cringe that nobody else would have the balls to say.

HATE: The prospect of thunderstorms this weekend. That shit is scary; the only way I like "Thunderstruck" is by AC/DC.

LOVE: My peoples, holding me down. Gotten some calls in the past week I wasn't expecting, and it's always nice to hear from people. Plus, I got a really nice e-mail from my friend Diane, who I haven't seen since roughly 1836. I'm kidding. 1837.

LOVE: Got my WrestleMania recap done with the time I had holed up in the place. At least outside of the occassional headache I'm able to sit down and bang it out on the keys sometimes.

LOVE: AMC for having the cojones to put on Lake Placid after Silence of the Lambs.

LOVE: Next Friday I will be healthy and have money.

LOVE: I hope to refurbish Danny's bowling kindness by taking him out to the Strip Club next weekend at some point. Hopefully I won't be up to the gills in work, though...

Ambient music: Garbage - #1 Crush

Rosser Goes Hollywood

A few words about WrestleMania.

Yup.

Be there, aloha...

Ambient music: Method Man & Redman - Da Rockwilder

Little High, Little Low

For the first time since I debuted the Sinister Fling last year, I had a game fall apart like Black Thought was on the mic.

Danny whomped my ass sixteen ways from Sunday: 155-74.

No, you read that right. 74. I lost by more than I put up. It was literally the worst I'd bowled since I hit puberty in the late Mesozoic.

You'd think the following comeback wins in which I posted 103 and 134 would make me feel better, but not really. I mean, 74! That's just galling. Never again.

ADDENDUM: Did, in fact, do the Churning the Butter dance on three or four occassions. I tend to individualize mine with a final slashing fist pump.

Ambient music: Apocalyptica - Enter Sandman

Rosser Hot Fifteen

AWAY:
"Lovers And Friends" (4), "Bring Em Out" (7), "Toma" (15)

15) Ying Yang Twins, "Wait" (re-entry)
14) Beck, "E-Pro" (debut)
13) Jimmy Eat World, "Work" (12)
12) 50 Cent, "Just A Lil' Bit" (debut)
11) Common feat. Kanye West & the Lost Poets, "The Corner" (14)*

10) John Legend, "Ordinary People" (8)
09) Louis XIV, "Finding Out True Love Is Blind" (11)*
08) Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl" (13)*
07) Weezer, "Beverly Hills" (10)*
06) the Game & 50 Cent, "Hate It Or Love It" (3)

05) Snoop Dogg feat. Justin Timberlake & Charlie Wilson, "Signs" (9)*
04) T.I., "You Don't Know Me" (2)

03) 50 Cent, "Disco Inferno" (1)

02) Ludacris, "Number One Spot" (6)*

01) Amerie, "1 Thing" (5) [2w]

Ambient music: Ohio Players - Love Rollercoaster

Hate It Or Love It Friday

LOVE: My brand new night stand, $170 down from $500. Why? TWO SCRATCHES. Even after I pointed out to the saleswoman I was a) male b) single c) in my 20s and d) black, it was still $170. I throw my shit when I get home on top of it anyway, so I'm not even going to see the scratches. And it ain't like I'm running MoMA so I'm not "(shuddering gasp) Unclean! Unclean!" SUCKERS.

LOVE: Not having to hear another word about my beatdown sloppier than Paris dresser...

LOVE: Because Aaron & I Office Spaced that bitch into the grave right after moving the night stand in with a ball bat.

LOVE: I had the foresight to have pictures of the occassion taken, including my swing that was so hard the dresser hung off the end of the bat.

HATE: I won't be able to see the photo assisstant's face as they develop these pictures.

HATE: Paying off for Natalie. THE CELL PHONE, you dirty, dirty bastards.

HATE: Between the night stand, Natalie, rent, & paying off my taxes, I will be living hand-to-mouth for the next fortnight. No parties, no poker, no bowling, no sex, no drugs, no wine, no women. I believe this will quadruple the amount of you-know-what when it's dark.

LOVE: One-hit wonders. :)

HATE: My brother on this computer. I always have to reset it when he's done, and put my playlist back in Winamp, and make sure he didn't download any more computer-coupon walking file viruses, and whatnot. And he shoves the keyboard in, which for some reason aggravates me the most.

LOVE: Sin City with friends. I feel like such a pusher.

LOVE: Orange Kool-Aid. "Ain't nuthin' wrong with THAT!"

HATE: Actually being home on Friday nights--talk about a wasteland for television. Yeesh!

Ambient music: Jet - Are You Gonna Be My Girl

7 Other Reasons To Love Sin City

1. Carla Gugino's ass is really nice.
2. Mickey Roarke : this movie :: David Carradine : Kill Bill
3. "As useful as a palsy victim doing brain surgery with a pipe wrench". I may feel the need to say that a few hundred times in the next few months.
4. "That's a damn fine coat you're wearing."
5. The one victim of Miho's who gets dialogue after being victimized, leading to IMSNHO the funniest dialogue in the movie.
6. I hope right before I die I'm coherent enough to have MY last words be "Is that all you got, you bastards?" Hell, that'd make a fine epitaph, methinks.
7. Jessica Alba--but in a white t-shirt and jeans. HA!

Ambient music: Live - White, Discussion

The Following Events Took Place Between 1:00 and 2:00 P.M.

After stretching out the procrastination like turkey meat I finally went off to file for '05. I was done in like 20 minutes. Another benefit of being single and keeping the mouse in the house. Appropriately enough, I am in the black, and even after paying them off I'm still coming out $80 in the lead.

So I celebrate with a couple on sale pints of Baskin-Robbins chocolate chip, "It Was A Good Day" blaring in my ears. I think I've got another cheap excuse to resee Sin City, heh heh heh.

Seed money for Miami! Daddy's coming, girl!

Ambient music: Counting Crows - American Girls

Rosser Hot Fifteen

LAST GOODBYE:
"Let Me Love You" (6), "Just A Moment" (11), "Let's Get Blown" (12), "Obsession" (13), "Wait" (14), "Hold You Down" (15)

15) Pitbull feat. Lil' Jon, "Toma" (9)
14) Common feat. Kanye West & the Last Poets, "The Corner" (debut)
13) Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl" (debut)
12) Jimmy Eat World, "Work" (8)
11) Louis XIV, "Finding Out True Love Is Blind" (debut)

10) Weezer, "Beverly Hills" (debut)
09) Snoop Dogg feat. Justin Timberlake & Charlie Wilson, "Signs" (debut)
08) John Legend, "Ordinary People" (10)*
07) T.I., "Bring 'Em Out" (7)
06) Ludacris, "Number One Spot" (5)

05) Amerie, "1 Thing" (debut)
04) Lil' Jon & the Eastside Boyz feat. Usher & Ludacris, "Lovers And Friends" (3)

03) the Game & 50 Cent, "Hate It Or Love It" (1)

02) T.I., "You Don't Know Me" (4)*

01) 50 Cent, "Disco Inferno" (2) [2nd time, 1m]

Ambient music: Korn - Somebody Someone

The (Almost) Deadly Sin

All right, the cinematography is some of the best I've ever seen in my life. Yes, the stories and twists are extremely well done. Yes, there's a little dark humor in it which in my SRO-viewing went over gangbusters.

Anybody reading this blog wants my reaction to The Scene.

Yes, it was so fantastiawesome not only did I just invent a word back there, I captialized unneccessarily (to some).

There were a couple earlier teases which made me just want it more. And then it was the big scene. I gasped and put my hands over the armrests I'd pulled down for this specific moment. A lot of people looked at me, including the little girl next to me. Hey, what the fuck parent is letting a little kid go see Sin City ANYfuckingWAY? How dare her eight-year-old ass judge me. I know she's prepubescent, but she don't know.

It was in slow-mo. Why did no one tell me it was in slo-mo!?!?!?

And then, all of a sudden, everything changes. My heart starts picking up speed. It's gone from quiet to awake. Awake quickly becomes racing. Racing becomes Audobahn. I'm not blinking. I thought I had to blink. I'm not. My heart is going three times its normal rate. I can't even hear the Bruce Willis voiceover, all I hear is the beating of my heart in my ears for the first time ever big as life boomboomboomboomboomboom and then I start shaking from the internal force and before I die from a coronary the best twelve seconds ever commited to film is over.

And a minute later it's like nothing happened.

I have never felt a rush like that in my life.

I almost died.

It was awesome. So very awesome. In Network, Howard Beale sees the face of God and it tells him what to do. Everybody else thinks he's crazy.

I am now Howard Beale.

I regret nothing.

Ambient music: Jimi Hendrix - Voodoo Child (Slight Return)

Jessica Alba & 24 Other Famous Hotties: April '05

DROPPED: Esther Baxter (18), Gloria Velez (19)

25. Tyra Banks (re-entry, peak 19)
24. Jamie Pressly (13/7)
23. Eliza Dushku (20/3)
22. Monica Bellucci (24/17)
21. Amanda Beard (25/21)

20. Stacy Keibler (17/16)
19. Kristanna Loken (re-entry/8)
18. Kylie Minogue (23/18)
17. Sofia Vergara (21/8)
16. Carmen Electra (14/5)
15. Halle Berry (16/15)
14. Natalie Portman (11/8)
13. Lacey Chabert (22/13)
12. Kitana Baker (15/10)
11. Beyonce Knowles (11/4)

10. Rachel Bilson (9/7)

9. Salma Hayek (7/7)

8. Vida Guerra (both 4)

7. Adriana Lima (10/3)

6. Brooke Burke (8/1)

5. Josie Maran (both 5)

4. Angelina Jolie (6/1)

3. Eva Longoria (both 3)

2. Trish Stratus (2/1)

1. Star Jones. Oh, right, April Fool's. Jessica Alba (both 1)

Ambient music: Factory 81 - Insane in the Brain