Drinking While Black: Super Ballin' XXVI

I remember back back in the day I used to do this column for APA, and it went away due to sobriety via depression. Well, it's a new year, so I figure why the hell not?

The new DWB ranks the evening in four major categories:

• Atmosphere. Was there drama? Certain delicious costumes? Did I get hassled by the Man? This is 60% of the overall grade.
• Food & drink. C'mon, it's right there in the title. Considering something needs to be in the tummy to cushion the blow, did I lay down the red carpet or a bunch of urine-soaked broken glass? 10%.
• Location. Also the fear factor, as in: did I fear for my life at any point? Or did I feel like I didn't belong in the fun I'm-getting-away-with-something sort of way? 10%.
• Music. Crucial, especially in club excursions. Did I hear a good mix of tunes, or was it that damn Nelly & Tim McGraw song 49 times in a row until I punched the DJ out and got sent to county? 57846437%. Or 20%, whatever.

ATMOSPHERE
Really good early as the old "tell them 8:15 to get them there by 8:30" SDCC mentality paid dividends. I had my Rick James wig on and it turns out we actually were put in a private room known as the Champagne Room. Couldn't be more serious. Stupid me, however, sat not facing the crowd since there was no head of the table and missed out on the eye candy. Sigh. It was nice to get my friends together especially since I hadn't seen some of them in ages, and it was even better to get a picture of my pimp chalice in progress. (HAH?) I spent a lot of time looking for Ivan, and then when we couldn't find him and proclared him dead it cast a real pall over the dinner.

(Luckily, he's only in a coma. <-- Joke. ) Despite that, everyone got along. Met up with a couple of people at On Broadway, which was obscenely packed per the usual. Atmosphere was great, even if my eyes suffered whiplash and whatnot. Prices one has to pay, is all. I only wish the DJ had actually screwed more than once every 45 minutes so I could've ran around to the other rooms in the place and inside the bank vault. Three stars out of four.

FOOD & DRINK
Self-prepared medium well sirloin steak (the leftovers made a good sandwich during the Bowl), some of the best onion rings and big cut fries on the face of the Earth, and four Purple Hooters. I don't know the scientific explanation for it, but alcohol made it good. Oh, and I drank two shots of something-or-other at On Broadway. No roofies, no anal leakage. Skoal! Four stars.

LOCATION
Part 1 took place at the Gaslamp Strip Club, which as usual was going off on a Saturday night. One of my favorite places in town to eat, and definitely my most favorite to cook considering the view. Once I'd gorged myself like a Roman god it was off to the best dance club in town three years running, On Broadway. The line was surprisingly short, and like a G I pulled up around 11 when things were pretty much in swing and going off and hung in there until they shut the fucker down. Four stars. Would've gotten five if Aaron danced, six if he'd done the Robot.

MUSIC
Luckily, didn't hear that damn Nelly & Tim McGraw song. Gaslamp played a bunch of the Tribe Called Quest Anthology and some old Beasties stuff. At On Broadway, good mix of the newer stuff with the classics ("Big Poppa", "Ain't No Fun") . But no "Lovers & Friends" as the evening was winding down? For SHAME. Four stars. If someone ever plays Lighter Shade of Brown's "Hey DJ" again, that'd be a great way to get five stars, hint hint.

So overall, doing the math, it was a 3.4 star night, which is excellent bordering on immortal. Considering some of the notable abscences that's a hell of a number.

Could've used some Brenda & Glenda, but I'd say that about a funeral...

Ambient music: Mercy Drive - Away